Beginning today I am releasing my fears and all of my doubt.
I am going to take one day at a time with or without.
Rising above the storm and hoping to make it out alive.
Working on restoring my faith before I take a dive.
Alone and hopeless I have felt way too many days and nights.
Like someone stuck me in a hole and turned off the lights.
No room to breathe and no room to be myself at all.
It isn't surprising that I would eventually fall.
Hiding from the pain seems at times to be the way.
But most the time the nightmares find me in the day.
Death is not so easy to forget about and overcome.
Knowing the door has been shut and you aren't welcome.
Being a person who is not afraid to die anymore.
I still often wonder what we are here for?
I hope I can make a difference in the next few years.
Then at least I will know the meaning of the tears.
1 comment:
The darkness..*sigh* I know it well, but I also know the light.
Sometimes when we are stuck within the void of the darkness it is difficult to see the light... Keep looking.
There will be days it is so bright, darkenss can't seep through. Other days, the light is that of a star in the night, you just catch a glimpse...hold on.
I know right now is seems you just can't take the pain anymore. You can't hide from it, it finds you where ever you are. It may seem as though God has abandoned you...he hasn't. He is standing/sitting/lying right next to you. He feels your pain. Give it to him, follow the light.
You are my lamp, O LORD; the LORD turns my darkness into light.
-2 Samuel 22:29
You, O LORD, keep my lamp burning;
my God turns my darkness into light.
-Psalms 18:28
It's okay to be angry...do what you need to do...Cry, scream, puke...but DO NOT turn away from God. For when you do Satan will have won. When he wins, I promise you will not see happiness,joy,or beauty in life. You will forever live in the darkness.
I still have my bad days. Days when I just can't move...breathe.
I hold on to the promise that He will never forsake me, and I see the light regardless of how small.
God loves you! Rest in His loving arms...let him show you His light. In our human nature it is difficult to understand what God's purpose is in our pain. He speaks to each of us individually, He will reveal to you his plans.
For I know the plans I have for you, the plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
-Jeremiah 29:11
I've enclosed some scripture from my blog post; I am broken: part 2.
Still broken, these words led me to his light.
Hold on...don't let go, He won't.
A Prayer: To you, O Lord, I called:
to the Lord I cried for mercy"
"What gain is there in my destruction,in my going down into the pit? Will the dust praise you?
Will it proclaim your faithfulness?
Hear, O Lord, and be merciful to me:O Lord, be my help."
Psalms 30:8-10
The Rescue: He reached down from on high and took hold of me; he drew me out of deep waters.
He rescued me from my powerful enemy,from my foes, who were too strong for me.They confronted me in the day of my disaster,but the Lord was my support.He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me.
2Samuel 22:17-20
His Love: Let your face shine on your servant;save me in your unfailing love.
Psalms 31:16
The Light: "I am the light of the world.Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life."
John 8:12
Your word is a lamp to my feet
and a light to my path.
Psalms 119:105
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